Stig, who was previously dissed and not asked to join the Society, gets a second chance to impress the members with a new tale. He rocks the socks off the stuffy society because his episode stars two celebrities! Stiggy knows he has it in the bag with, “The Tale of Station 109.1.”
Chris played one too many games of hide and seek in a graveyard and is now a morbid “Harold and Maude” type. He’s goth but even as he ponders the many ways to die during a perfectly good Canadian dinner, he is not all that convincing. Instead of playing sports he’s suffocates crickets in large glass jars. I’m pretty sure he’s less goth and more sociopathic, but AYAOTD only has so many minutes to delve into any possible psychosis.
Oh, Chris has a cooler older brother named Jamie played by some guy named, RYAN GOSLING. But I’m not here to talk about one of the thirteen celebrities you can spot in AYAOTD. I’m here to celebrate some of the most complex and heartbreaking yarns of our time. Yes, so Jamie comes up with a master plan to really get Chris to snap out of it: He locks him in a hearse! I was impressed with Ryan, I mean Jamie’s, hot wiring skills. Also, even prepubescent Ry…Jamie is fine.
Chris thinks being in a hearse is awesome until he realizes he’s trapped. Not one to waste time he catches the radio station, 109.1. It’s off the dial if you know what I mean. It’s all about coming home and finding the way home blah blah home. Jamie runs away from the hearse after locking his brother inside and some super old dude out of nowhere is all, “Can you help me home?” Wtf, Jamie does not help him home. My first assumption was he has Alzheimer’s and this guy needs some assistance. This makes me think Canadians are not that nice.
Anyway, Chris uses the Internet to find the address to this mysterious radio station. The true star in this episode, other than Ryan, is the internet. It’s so simple it seems sinister. My sister and I used to fight hours over using something that could really only pull up addresses and let you talk to strangers in AOL chat rooms. You know we were all doing it. Parents were so innocent.
O.k., Chris finds this radio station and its run by DJ Roy aka Gilbert Gottfried, way before Aflac, tsunami jokes and getting fired from Aflac. Turns out the radio station is the afterlife navigator for people too busy to die properly. Once you get there they slap a slap bracelet on you and you wait your turn to enter who the hell knows where. Ha, it could be hell if you were a bad gosling (Bam!).
Side note: Slap bracelets were all the rage in my hometown, Ocala, FL. However, they were banned because inevitably the protective fabric wore away, leaving exposed metal. The metal combined with the slapping action and placement on the wrist was causing serious injuries. Kids from the 90’s were way tougher than the babies of today.
DJ Roy is super annoyed by Chris, who at this point I’m annoyed with as well, for taking screen time away from Ryan. Roy doesn’t do his job properly but does manage to knock the DMV a few times, and incorrectly assumes Chris is the dead guy who needed help home. Some hijnks ensue: Chris tries to escape, DJ Roy gets perturbed, “Ghost” like ghouls take some people away and finally Ryan finds Chris because Chris didn’t clear his browsing history. Again, so innocent! The old guy shows up too because “home” is actually the afterlife. This whole thing could have been avoided if Chris was a better Canadian.
Too late. DJ Roy is a dick and decides to throw Chris to the wolves by tossing him through some door to the afterlife. All is not lost! The door gets indigestion and spats Chris right back out. DJ Roy laments that he’s in trouble with his boss. It’s not comforting that even after you are dead you still worry about your pension and reprimands from the boss.
Chris is super happy he’s not dead and that guy who wanted help home is super happy he goes to heaven. Chris drops the black attire, instead choosing a life full of baseball with Ryan. I personally felt he looked better in black, but that’s just my taste. Do you think the actor who played Chris hits up Ryan for, um, anything and everything? I bet he’s telling the Tale of Station 109.1 right now to some chick in a bar. I would.
AYAOTD most definitely warns girls and boys to be good because the afterlife is a waitin’ for YOU. I wish they would have remained a bit more secular. I blame Real Proloux or whatever that French guy’s name is in the credits. Oh, and Stig makes it into the Society. Too bad his season ends about two episodes later. Way harsh Tai, way harsh.
This post is submitted for your approval by Alex. Special thanks to Sarah for teaching me about the internet and screenshots. This has truly been a productive and blessed day.